Listful Mondays: Reading Hazards

 Reading Hazards


We all know how dangerous our favorite hobby/time waster can be. (I am talking about reading, of course, Bloggies.) Let's put together a list of those hazards that have befallen us because of it.

1. Cold Hands. For some reason my hands turn to ice as I read and I soon require blankets.
2. Hand Cramps. Especially if I'm reading a hardback or tightly bound book that requires effort to hold it up or hold it open.
3. Time Warp. It's 2:00 am? How did that happen? I've only been reading for a few minutes...
4. Hearing Incapacitation. "Mom! I've asked you 5 times if we can have lunch yet!" "...Huh? I'm sorry. I didn't hear you!"
5. Kitchen Disasters. Including, but not limited to, water overflowing the sink (my mom was furious) and burnt food.
6. Big Purse Syndrome. (Though for the record, I hate the word purse and refer to mine as My Life. And it's a little backpack.) It has to be big enough to carry at least one novel.
7. Literary Crying/Laughing. Yes, we will suddenly burst into tears or fits of laughter while reading. No, we are too involved to be embarrassed.
8. P.A.B.D. Post Amazing Book Depression. Check out this by 25 Hour Books for more information. This requires a whole post unto itself, since I missed weekly geeks last week.
9. T.B.R. Pile Stress. My brother was recently baffled by this phenomenon. He strove to clarify that none of the reading stress was from school or anything else that could conceivably require me to read anything. I don't think I defended myself well.
10. Loss of Sleep. Refer back to Time Warp. Also when you can't fall asleep after such an exciting part of the story, or when you dream all blinkin' night about the book.
11. Sequel Anticipation. Ya know, when you're just gonna die waiting.
12. Loss of Money. It's a problem. That innocent stack of books at Borders totals really fast. And Amazon....ah Amazon...you suck me in with your free shipping and I forget I just spent $86 on books.
13. Fictional Character Confusion. That's the confusion that exists when a pretend person becomes so important to you that you forget they are pretend.
14. Eye Strain. Particularly evident when trying to read when it is really too dark.
15. Dialect Transference. When you put down that period book or that regional story and find yourself talking that way for at least an hour afterward.
16. Mispronunciations. Those big words you only encountered while reading and said wrong in your head for years, then got laughed at when you used it out loud. (reverberated, chasm, rapport...) Or the confusion engendered when you discuss the book with someone and you can't figure out which character they are talking about because you've been saying it wrong the whole time.
17. Dirty House. Who has time to clean?

What hazards have you encountered??

{Next week: A Collection. Perhaps the titles in your crockpot cooking corner, or all the Newberry's you own, or the rhyming picture books. I'll be going with my pride and joy - my Pumpkin Book Collection. Especially since you all have heard enough about my fairy tales.}