What Do You Think About BAD YA Romance and Rape Culture??

 A few weeks ago I ran into a bunch of fascinating links and started mad clicking and reading with my mouth open and my head nodding. Call me sheltered, call me naive, call me uneducated...but I was not actively aware of certain cultural flaws, or of many of the books discussed below. But Wow. Just wow. I'm not saying every article and view point contains unadulterated "truth," but a lot struck a resonating chord within me.

I know there are quite a few links below, and many cross-reference each other and there is some overlap within the articles, but I think it would be worth your while to check them out.

Jessica Day George's review  of Hush Hush
why ya romance needs to change by In Which A Girl Reads
Another Post About Rape
Bad Romance (or, YA & Rape Culture)
And THIS one at University of Fantasy

For the record, I have not read Hush Hush and offer no personal opinion on it. I have read positive reviews as well as these negative ones. (I wanted to read it before I put up these links, but I don't think I'll get my hands on it anytime in the near future.)

What do I think? Well, the short of it...I  need to (1) be more aware of the romantic relationship dynamics of what I read (2) be mindful to NOT financially support BAD romance (3) be watchful of what my daughters read and (4) teach my daughters to stand up for themselves - always - and that includes screaming. It has also cast a new light on a few episodes from my first year in college and allowed me to judge my reactions a little less harshly than I have in the past. Behaving the way you are supposed to behave does not ensure that others will behave the way they are supposed to.

Now, I really really really want to know what you think!

Review: Rebecca by Daphne de Maurier

Rebecca
by Daphne de Maurier
Classic/Mystery/Romance
410 pages
published: 1938
For: Book Club
1 of 5 stars

Well, you know what I thought of the beginning, but I hadn't finished the book and had not formed my final opinion. I was hoping it would change. Ironically, about half a chapter after my rant, things started to improve. Wanna know why?? People started talking!!!

I didn't before realize how important conversation was to me.

About:

Maxim de Winter brings a young new wife home to his estate where the presence of his late wife, Rebecca still lingers. The new Mrs. de Winter has trouble learning to run a house, trouble with the scornful housekeeper, and trouble staying close to her troubled husband. What happened to Rebecca?

Reaction:

Things had picked up after the first 100 pages. There were new characters, there was confusion, there was mystery. And then there was the freakish housekeeper. Makes me think about traveling asylums, perhaps like door-to-door salespeople:

Ding Dong.
"May I help you?"
"We were just wondering if you had any crazy people you would like us to take off your hands?"
"Why yes. My housekeeper is worshiping a dead sociopath and tried to kill me!"
"Well, we can take care of that for you! Load her up, Frank!"
"What a relief. I'm so glad you were in the neighborhood today."
"No problem Ma'am. That's our job."

But I digress.

So I was enjoying the book finally. I was truly thinking it might all be salvageable. It got creepy. There were several layers of "bad guys." There was the fear of getting found out. There were a few fewer descriptions of flowers and definitely fewer imaginings of Nameless. There was rising action...dramatic action...relief....more rising action...

Then splat.

It didn't finish. It just stopped. I searched the back matter. I searched the crease of my book in case pages had been ripped out. Nope. The book just didn't have an end. ???? I tried to read the included "alternate" epilogue and choked. I re-read the epilogue in the second chapter, choked, tried harder, skimmed, and then called it good. I gave this book more than it deserved already.

Questions Not Answered: (Spoilers Alert!!)

1. Why didn't Nameless have a name? (In the author notes, Mrs. du Maurier said something like not being able to think of one, then writing no name as a sort of challenge.) Not good enough reasons!! Why didn't she have a name! Or a face! Or an age! This wasn't any sort of a deal breaker, but it was annoying.
2. Why stop the book before the end?
3. Did everyone die? Did everyone live?
4. Did Favell not call Mrs. Danvers in time? Why did she set the house on fire? Did she even do it?
5. Why did it go all Jane Eyre at the end?
6. Why did they leave the country? Their life had some rough spots, yes, but leave the whole country??
7. If they "had" to leave the country, why live a boring, sad life? Why not go adventuring like on their honeymoon? These people are easily broken!!
8. Why was Mrs. Danvers so dedicated to a sociopath?
9. Why didn't Max produce proof of adultery as evidence to divorce Rebecca and get out of his nightmare long before that night? Didn't they such things as personal dectectives?
10. But most importantly: WHY STOP THE BOOK BEFORE THE END?!?!?!?

I may have listed something twice, but so what? Endings are important. A whole book can be ruing by a bad end.

I'm done.

Review: Bet Me by Jennifer Crusie

Bet Me
by Jennifer Crusie
Romance
432 pages
published 2004
5 of 5 stars

As I've been "getting out" more and reading other book blogs I have found myself in the quandary of suddenly needing to read a lot of books I've never heard of. This might not have hit me so hard had I not already been in a difficult reading spot. You see, for some reason this year I've been reading a lot of "adult" books. Classic, Epic Fantasy, Tough Subjects. I found myself reluctant to pick up any of the books I was reading. That is unusual for me. More like unheardof. And it wasn't because I don't like the books I am reading. I do. But I needed a break. When I read this review by Angieville, I was sucked in. I didn't even let it bother me that it was surely a RomanceRomance book.

About?

After getting dumped in a bar by an boyfriend she really didn't like, Min overhears her ex make a bet to his good looking friend that he couldn't score with Min in a month, and Min overhears. Furious, she reasons that playing the player would get her a date to her sister's wedding and satisfy her desires for justice and revenge. But after the first antagonist date, Min realizes that she is no player and gives it all up. Good looking Calvin is happy to oblige. His charm had never failed him before, and he had enough man-hating wisecracks in that one date to last him a lifetime. Unfortunately, Min and Cal keep running into each other and have to deal with their mutual attraction and dislike.

Reaction?

I needed this book. It was fun and funny and kept me turning pages. I loved Min and Cal and all their friends. They felt like real people with real problems. I loved the dialogue! I loved the verbal sparring. Min knew what Cal was after (or she thought she did) and therefore had no holds on her behavior. Since she wasn't trying to impress anyone she didn't hold her tongue. I found it hilarious. Cal was confused and surprised and pulled out of his own behavior rut. I loved that she didn't have a perfect body or a perfect relationship with her mother. I loved that she was attractive even with her extra weight. I loved the little twists - and there were a few - that gave the story and characters more depth.

The real strengths of this book were the dialogue, the humor, and the characters.

I do feel like I should have two different rating scales, or something, to account for the fact that this book is not an example of amazing plotting, drama, growth, social commentary, or anything of real "value." But I would argue that entertainment can sometimes be just as "valuable." Yes, it was predictable and complete fluff. But I loved it anyway!

Recommended for?
A mature audience. There was mild language and sexual content.

Weekly Geeks 2010-6: Romancing the Tome

In honor of Valentine's weekend, let's talk about romantic literature. By that, I don't necessarily mean the modern romance genre, but books that you find particularly romantic.

Feel free to explore any or all of these prompts:

• What literary couple is your favorite?
  
• How do you define romantic literature? Does it always involve sex? or the hint of sex?
  
• What author/s do you think writes romantic scenes particularly well?
• Do you have a favorite romantic scene in a book?

Favorite literary couples? Let's see...off the top of my head:

• Anne and Gilbert
• Elizabeth and Darcy (of course)
• Margaret and Mr. Thornton
• Jane and Mr. Rochester
• Percy and Annabeth
• Sarah and Jack Elliot
• Ron and Hermione
• Beauty and the Beast

I would have to define romantic literature as: a book wherein 2 characters develop a romantic relationship. (That turned out much shorter than I thought!)

There definitely does not need to be sex. In fact, the most romantic scenes do not have it. That being said, under certain circumstances, I do not mind it, I might even like it. Vague. Hmmmm.... I don't like sex when the protagonists are teenagers. Given my particular belief set, I prefer it to be after marriage. But I understand that others have differing values, characters included, and can handle it when we are talking about adults. But please, please, please, I don't need as much detail as is often included.

What is romantic? Conversation, conversation, conversation, and physical contact. I love dialogue between couples. I love sparring with words. I love those exchanges that have many layers of meaning. And I love it when they come in contact, be that kissing or hand holding or saving each other in a battle or bumping into each other in the dark or any sort of casual touch that is so much more because of how they feel about each other. Romance comes from overcoming difficulties like the rules of society (like Jane and Mr. Rochester), danger (like Ron and Hermione), and their own personal issues (like Margaret and Mr. Thornton). Tension is romantic. There is both physical attraction tension and emotional tension. Others things that can contribute: secrets, confusion, misunderstandings, separations,and longing. Having the characters thrown together into difficult or unlikely situations can be very romantically charged.

I don't go for RomanceRomance books. I am of the opinion that there has to be something else going on in the story - mystery and adventure being my top picks. I do NOT like romance in young teenagers. They need to be at least 14. Better yet, 16.

A romantic scene pops does into my head. It takes place in The Apprentice by Deborah Talmadge-Bickmore, a romanticif self-indulgent fantasy novel I've read a dozen times. I considered typing it out, but not only was it too much work, I started to feel like an idiot. I think there is something very personal about how one reactions to romantic scenes.

For me, romance should be present in most novels. I often feel the story is incomplete without it. Happy Romance Month!

Review: Light of the Moon by Luanne Rice

Light of the Moon
by Luanne Rice

Romance
496 pages
published: 2008
For: Live Dangerously Challenge
3 of 5 stars

While shopping with my family at the ever-popular Costco, I had a revelation as to how to start my living dangerously challenge. I always go through the movies at Costco, but rarely spend any time with the books unless I know something big is coming out. Why? Because that flat of books is everything I DON'T read. Those books are contemporary, popular books, written for adults! (And I don't mean popular with librarians, or with fellow writers, or with book reading friends, I mean popular with the masses.) Yes, I am a snob.

So I decided, while staring at the sea of literary pizzas, that I would pick one out and read it. *Gasp* I hesitated. Then I picked one up and read the back. *Bigger gasp* I put that down and read another back. And another. Then another. They were only getting worse! My shuddering became violent as I came to the end of the row where I encountered such authors as Grisham, whom I've successfully avoided all my life. I nearly failed at my resolve...but I staggered back to the beginning and picked up the first book I had looked at. I have to confess that my decision reflected both the fact that my family had moved on and I needed to hurry, and that fact that it was one of the cheapest.

Sidenote: My sweet husband didn't flinch one bit when I told him the strange book in the cart was for my dangerous challenge. :)

First, let me admit that I read this book and was entertained. I am a story sucker. I was also surprised and thrilled to find no swearing and no sex. I didn't know that was even possible these days. I enjoyed learning snippets about a different country and culture, and I enjoyed the info about the main character's career as an anthropologist who studied cave paintings. I cared about the characters and feel fortunate in my random selection.

That being said, this book was based on the whole "fly away to a romantic country to escape your problems and find your true love in the tiny foreign town." It has the obligatory "get rescued by hot cowboy on white horse" (literally) and the "we are so instantly and dramatically attracted to each other physically it is almost more than we can bear" elements. I guess that's what makes a good stirring romance? I admit I happily finished it. But I'm not going to be rereading it, remembering it long, or even keeping it. (Anyone want it?)

My only serious criticism is that I thought the whole thing a bit melodramatic. The love interest's problems just seemed a bit overdone. The main character's need to escape felt exaggerated considering that her problems weren't all the bad.

That's it. Enjoyable. Nothing special.

Recommended For: people who like that kind of thing, anyone wanting a momentary escape